CELPIP Writing Task 1: Writing an Email

CELPIP Writing Task 1 Sample Answer: Help with Moving Day

This friendly email asks Jordan to help carry furniture on moving day and offers a thank-you. The tricky part is making a real request with a clear time while still sounding relaxed and not pushy.

Time

27 minutes

Length

150–200 words

Tone

Formal or semi-formal, depending on the reader

The question

You are moving to a new apartment across Winnipeg on the May long weekend. You have rented a truck, but you do not have enough people to help you carry heavy furniture. Your friend Jordan has helped you in the past.

Write an email to your friend Jordan in about 150-200 words. Your email should do the following things:

Tell him about your move.

Explain what help you need and when.

Offer something to thank him for his help.

How to plan your answer

What they want

A friendly, informal email to your friend Jordan asking for help on moving day.
Cover: your move, what help you need and when, and how you'll thank him.

Plan (27 min)

Greeting: "Hey Jordan," and share the news of your new apartment across Winnipeg.
Move: the May long weekend; you've rented a truck; a bigger place closer to work.
Help: carry heavy furniture like the couch, bed frame and washer; give the day and time, e.g., Saturday 9:00 a.m. to about 2:00 p.m.
Thanks: pizza and drinks after, dinner at a restaurant, or help with his next project.
Closing: thank him for helping before too, ask him to confirm, first name.

Useful vocabulary

moving truck, heavy lifting, load and unload, dolly
couch, long weekend, owe you one, return the favour

Phrases

Guess what? I'm finally moving to...
Would you be able to help me...?
As a thank-you, I'd love to...

Avoid

Forgetting the specific day and time.
Sounding like you expect his help; ask politely.

Excellent answer: around CLB 11–12

Hi Jordan, Hope you're doing well! I've got some news: I've finally signed a lease on a two-bedroom place in St. Boniface, so I'm leaving my cramped apartment in the West End over the May long weekend. I've booked a truck for Saturday morning, but I'm worried about manpower. My sister has offered to help, but between the two of us, there's no way we can get my sofa, bookshelves and queen bed frame down three flights of stairs without an elevator. Would you be able to lend a hand? I'm hoping to start loading around 9:00 a.m. and have everything at the new place by early afternoon. Given how smoothly my last move went with you, you were the first person I thought of. Naturally, coffee, breakfast sandwiches and lunch are on me. More importantly, I'd like to return the favour properly, so whenever you're next moving or tackling a big project, count me in. I'd also love to have you over for a barbecue on my new balcony once I'm settled. Let me know if Saturday works, and no worries at all if you have other plans. Cheers, Sam

191 words

Why it scores high

Vocabulary: idiomatic choices such as 'worried about manpower', 'lend a hand' and 'return the favour properly' sound natural between friends.
Content/Coherence: 'down three flights of stairs without an elevator' and 'you were the first person I thought of' combine practical detail with warmth.
Task Fulfillment: offering help 'whenever you're next moving' plus a barbecue 'on my new balcony' makes the thanks generous and reciprocal.

Good answer: around CLB 7–8

Hi Jordan, I hope you're doing well! I have some exciting news: I'm finally moving out of my tiny apartment in Osborne Village. I found a bigger two-bedroom place in Transcona, and I'm moving on the May long weekend. I've already rented a truck for Saturday, May 16, but I'm short on people to help with the heavy furniture. My cousin is coming, but the two of us won't be able to carry the sofa, the dresser and the washing machine down three flights of stairs on our own. Would you be able to help? We'd start at 9:00 a.m. and I expect we'll be done by mid-afternoon. I remember how much easier my last move was with you there. Of course, I'll provide coffee and breakfast in the morning and pizza for lunch. To really thank you, I'd also love to take you to a Jets game next season, or cook you dinner once I'm settled in, whichever you prefer. Let me know if you're free. No pressure if you already have plans! Cheers, Alex

176 words

What works, and what's missing

Content/Coherence: 'carry the sofa, the dresser and the washing machine down three flights of stairs' explains exactly why extra help is needed.
Task Fulfillment: the thank-you offers 'a Jets game next season, or cook you dinner', a thoughtful and local touch, plus food on the day itself.
Vocabulary: the language is friendly and correct, but expressions like 'I'm short on people' are fairly common rather than distinctively idiomatic.

Basic answer: around CLB 4–5

Hi Jordan, How are you? I have a big news. I am moving to new apartment! The new place is in St. Vital, on the other side of Winnipeg. It is bigger and close to my work. I will move on the May long weekend. I already rent a truck, but I need help with heavy furniture. My brother can come, but only two people is not enough. I have a big sofa, a fridge and a bed. Can you help me on Saturday, May 16? We will start at 9 in morning. I think we finish around 3 o'clock. You help me last time and you are very strong, haha. To say thank you, I will buy pizza and drinks for lunch. Also, when I finish to unpack, I want to invite you for dinner at my new place. Please tell me if you can come. Thanks a lot, Minh

151 words

What holds it back

Readability: errors like 'I have a big news', 'I already rent a truck' and 'when I finish to unpack' appear throughout an otherwise well-organized email.
Vocabulary: 'only two people is not enough' and 'I think we finish around 3 o'clock' rely on simple structures that limit natural expression.
Content/Coherence: the plan for 'Saturday, May 16' from '9 in morning' is clear, but the 'you are very strong, haha' line feels abrupt.

These are original CELPass examples written at each level. The CLBs are our estimates, not official CELPIP scores. How we estimate CLB