CELPIP Writing Task 1: Writing an Email

CELPIP Writing Task 1 Sample Answer: Dark Walkway in an Edmonton Neighbourhood

This prompt asks you to write to your city councillor about broken and dim streetlights, how they affect residents and what should be done. The tricky part is showing why the councillor needs to step in, since the city has ignored earlier reports, while keeping a respectful tone.

Time

27 minutes

Length

150–200 words

Tone

Formal or semi-formal, depending on the reader

The question

You live in a residential area of Edmonton. Several streetlights on your street and along the walking path to the nearest bus stop have stopped working, and others are very dim. Now that it gets dark early, many residents feel unsafe walking in the evening. You reported the problem to the city weeks ago, but nothing has changed.

Write an email to your city councillor in about 150-200 words. Your email should do the following things:

Describe the lighting problem in your neighbourhood.

Explain how it affects the people who live there.

Suggest a solution and ask the councillor to take action.

How to plan your answer

What they want

A formal, respectful email to your city councillor about broken streetlights in your Edmonton neighbourhood.
Cover: the problem, how it affects residents, and a solution plus a request for action.

Plan (27 min)

Greeting: "Dear Councillor [name]," and say you are a resident of the ward, naming your street.
Problem: three lights burned out since August, others dim; the walking path to the bus stop is almost completely dark; you reported it to the city twice.
Effect: in winter it is dark by 5 p.m.; a neighbour tripped and was hurt; students and shift workers walk there; drivers can't see pedestrians.
Solution: replace the lights with brighter LED ones, add a light at the path entrance, schedule regular inspections; ask for a timeline.
Closing: thank them, full name, address.

Useful vocabulary

streetlight, burned out, dim, visibility
pedestrian, hazard, LED lighting, ward

Phrases

I am writing as a resident of...
This has become a safety concern because...
I would ask you to... before...

Avoid

Forgetting that you already reported it; it shows why you need the councillor.
Vague requests like "please do something"; ask for specific action.

Excellent answer: around CLB 11–12

Dear Councillor Martin, I am writing as a resident of Birchwood Crescent to ask for your help with a growing safety problem in our neighbourhood. Since August, three of the five streetlights on our street have been out, and the remaining two give off only a faint glow. Worse still, the walking path that connects our crescent to the bus stop on 66 Street is now almost completely dark. I reported both issues to the city in August and again in September, yet no repairs have been made. With evenings getting shorter, this has become a genuine hazard. The path is used every night by high school students and shift workers, and last week an elderly neighbour tripped on a raised section of pavement and injured her knee. Several drivers have also told me they can barely see pedestrians crossing. I would respectfully ask you to arrange for the broken fixtures to be replaced with brighter LED lights and for a new light to be installed at the path entrance, ideally before winter. I would appreciate an update on the timeline. Sincerely, Fatima Yusuf

184 words

Why it scores high

Content/Coherence: "Worse still" and "yet no repairs have been made" build the case step by step, explaining why the councillor must now get involved.
Vocabulary: Phrases such as "give off only a faint glow," "a genuine hazard" and "a raised section of pavement" are precise and natural.
Task Fulfillment: The request names two actions and a target, "ideally before winter," and politely asks for an update on the timeline.

Good answer: around CLB 7–8

Dear Councillor Martin, My name is Fatima Yusuf, and I live on Birchwood Crescent in your ward. I am writing about a serious problem with the streetlights in our neighbourhood. Since August, three of the five streetlights on my street have been out, and the remaining two are very dim. The walking path between our street and the bus stop on 66 Street is almost completely dark. I reported this to the city twice, but nothing has been repaired. This problem affects many residents. It now gets dark before 7 p.m., and by December it will be dark by 5. High school students and shift workers use the path every evening, and last week my neighbour tripped there and injured her knee. Drivers also have trouble seeing pedestrians crossing the street. I would ask you to have the broken lights replaced with brighter LED lights and to add a light at the entrance of the path. Could you please let me know when this work could be done? Sincerely, Fatima Yusuf

171 words

What works, and what's missing

Task Fulfillment: Specific facts like "three of the five streetlights" and "by December it will be dark by 5" make the problem easy to picture.
Readability: Each paragraph matches one point, and "This problem affects many residents" makes a clear topic sentence for the effects.
Vocabulary: Clear and correct, but words like "serious problem" and "very dim" are plain; a few more precise terms would make the case more forceful.

Basic answer: around CLB 4–5

Dear Councillor Martin, My name is Fatima Yusuf and I live on Birchwood Crescent in your ward. I want to tell you about a problem with streetlights. Since August three lights on my street don't work, and other lights are very weak. The path to bus stop is also very dark. Now in October it is dark at 6 o'clock, and soon more early. Many people walk on this path, students and people who finish work late. Last week my neighbour fall down on the path and hurt her knee because she can't see. Also drivers can't see people walk on the street. I call the city two times, in August and September, but nothing change. Please can you fix the lights soon and put new bright lights on the path? I hope you can help us before winter. Thank you, Fatima Yusuf

143 words

What holds it back

Content/Coherence: The earlier calls to the city appear in a separate one-line paragraph after the effects, so the email's order feels slightly broken.
Vocabulary: Errors such as "my neighbour fall down," "nothing change" and "soon more early" show weak control of verb forms and comparatives.
Task Fulfillment: "Please can you fix the lights soon" is a clear request, but it gives no specific timeline or reason why the councillor should act now.

The CLBs are estimates of the level each sample was written at, not official CELPIP scores. How we estimate CLB